He Didn’t Mention His Non-Binary Fiance at a Gathering for His Dying Grandfather, But When the Truth Came Out, His Family’s Transphobia Was All Too Clear 

A man recently asked for some advice because a family dinner went badly due to his family’s homophobia. Here’s what happened.

He Was Terminally Ill

We Don_t Meet The Doctor In Their Office
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The man’s grandfather had brain cancer, and his doctor said he had about three months to live.

They Arranged a Final Dinner

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The man’s parents and his grandmother arranged a big family dinner so that everyone could be together one last time and say their goodbyes. The man said, “It took a while to organize but everyone came to see my grandfather.”

They Had a Strict Religion

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All this would have been fine, except for the fact that his grandparents were devout Christians.

They Were Homophobic

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This caused a big problem because it meant they were also homophonic. The man said, “Lots of my cousins, and me, identify in the LGBTQ+ community.”

Family Dinners Were Awkward

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These opinions made family dinners difficult because it was clear that some family members didn’t care about the LGBTQ+ cousins as much as they did the straight and cisgendered ones.

The Grandfather Was the Worst

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In fact, it was the man’s grandfather who caused the most problems. He got so mad about some of his family being LGBTQ+ that it made him unwell; his heart started racing.

They’d Just Gotten Engaged

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The man and his non-binary partner had just got engaged, and although some family members knew about it, he’d chosen not to tell his grandfather for obvious reasons.

He Almost Didn’t Attend the Meal

The Same Conversation Across Different Locations
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The man hated having to hide his good news and almost didn’t go to the meal at all. However, he changed his mind for his mom’s sake. The man said, “This has really affected my mom, who supports me but doesn’t see why I have an issue.”

He Went Alone

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Just to ensure that his grandfather didn’t say anything upsetting, the man went to the dinner without his partner and only spoke to those family members accepting of who he was.

His Aunt Told Everyone

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Things seemed to be quite calm until the moment when the man’s aunt, who was homophobic herself, told his grandfather about the engagement and even showed him photos of the man’s non-binary partner.

He Was Questioned

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The man said, “This started my grandfather questioning me, then some of my other uncles and aunties.”

He Got Mad

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The man was tired of all the remarks and name-calling, so he stood up and yelled at everyone, but especially his grandfather, that they were being cruel and that the aunt had deliberately brought his partner into the conversation to start trouble.

He Left

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The man was so upset and angry that he left the dinner and went home.

He Texted His Mom

If She Doesn’t Reply, She Might Still Be Interested
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After calming down a little, the man texted his mom to let her know he wouldn’t be coming to any more family functions, and he definitely wouldn’t be attending his grandfather’s funeral. Since then, he’s not heard from her.

Was He Wrong?

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Was the man wrong to make a scene at such an important dinner, or was he right to stand up for himself and his relationship?

The Internet Responded

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One person commented, “Your homophobic aunt ruined the dinner by deliberately bringing up a hot-button topic, knowing that it would cause this drama. This was her doing, not yours.”

Another said, “Your aunt ruined the dinner, not you. I would consider soft-blocking all your closed-minded relatives on social media.”

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