She’s Furious Because Her Boyfriend’s Parents Won’t Let Them Sleep in the Same Room and He’s Too Scared to Say Anything

A woman recently asked if she was wrong for not wanting her controlling parents-in-law to visit because she knew they wouldn’t allow her to sleep with her boyfriend. Here’s what she had to say.

The couple lived together

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“My boyfriend and I have been living together for three years in a city in Australia,” the woman explained. “A few months ago, his parents arrived from India to live with us.”

She was excited to meet them

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She made every effort to make them feel welcome and comfortable, and it worked. They were really nice towards her, at least at the beginning.

His parents started making rules

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The visiting parents started laying down some house rules when they got comfortable. They wanted to dictate everything in the house, including who slept where.

They wouldn’t let the couple sleep in the same bed

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They told the son he shouldn’t sleep in the same bed as his girlfriend while they weren’t married, so he moved onto the couch. They also criticized the woman’s clothes, insisting she stopped wearing short skirts.

His mother took over the house

Assume We Are Good at Cleaning and Cooking
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The woman was banned from grocery shopping or cooking because they were his mother’s jobs. However, they refused to help with any household cleaning duties or chores because they were the woman’s responsibility.

This went on for four weeks

Entertain Me
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Then the parents went back to their home country. On reflection, the woman, who was also Indian, understood why they were like this. They were old-school and super-traditional people, but her main problem was with how her boyfriend acted.

He didn’t stand up for his girlfriend

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“He seems not to acknowledge any of these as real issues and did not stand up for me when his father had an issue with my clothes,” she said. She brought this up several times, but he always responded dismissively, saying things like, “So what? They’re guests. We have to make them feel comfortable,” or “My dad is traditional, and there’s nothing wrong with his mentality.”

His parents plan to visit soon

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The argument fizzled out, and things went back to normal, but the girl recently found out that his parents were coming to visit again, and they’ll bring all their rules back. She was devastated to learn they’d be staying for two months.

She is dreading the visit

Not Laughing at My Jokes
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Plus, she’s angry at her boyfriend for not asking her first. She told him it wasn’t fair. He responded by saying they are his parents, so she hasn’t got a choice. Then he dropped the bombshell that the visits will become more frequent, like several times a year.

The woman doesn’t know if she can live like this

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“I want to make it clear that I would never ask him to stop his parents from visiting us for a few weeks once a year or so,” she said, “But I am being asked to give up my privacy and personal space for months every year.”

She asked the internet for advice

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Not knowing what to do, she turned to Reddit for help. She’s worried that she’s overreacting, and she doesn’t want to fall out with her husband over something trivial. 

People responded

Emojis on Reddit

One user said, “If you don’t change the rules now, you can expect to be treated as an unwanted guest in your own home for the rest of your life.”

Another user replied, “Your boyfriend is waving lots of red flags at you. He’s telling you that in the future, he’ll be making decisions without consulting you and that he’ll expect you to take on all the household work.”

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