His Sister Hated Him From the Day He Was Born, but When Their Parents Insisted They Try to Get Along, He Told Them Some Home Truths

A young man recently asked for some advice because his older autistic sister doesn’t like him and doesn’t want to be near him, causing issues for everyone. Here’s what happened.

His sister didn’t like him

Unresolved Conflicts
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It seems that all siblings go through phases of not liking each other, but one young man’s older sister didn’t like him from the moment he was born, and she’d never changed her mind.

They were pushed together

You Make Your Kids Lie About Their Age
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His sister was four years older than him, and she was autistic. This can make interactions difficult, but her parents hadn’t handled things correctly when the young man was born; they’d just shoved the two together and hoped for the best.

They thought they’d get closer

Makes Sacrifices
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The young man said, “Our parents just sort of pushed me on her and assumed with time she would warm up to me. But I am everything that unsettles her.”

He changed everything

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One issue was that the young man had been a loud baby, and the older sister didn’t like a lot of noise. His birth also meant that all the regular routines that were so important to her had to change. The young man said, “She does not like not having a set structure for her days; she shuts down and becomes despondent.”

He did become quieter

Inability To Share Their Feelings
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Over the years, the young man became quieter, but although he tried to be considerate, he liked to listen to music. He was also very creative and artistic, and when he was working on a project, he’d make lots of mess. His older sister couldn’t stand it, and that caused further tension.

She was very blunt

Secretly Wish Ill On Others
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The young man’s older sister didn’t hold back with her feelings. “She wishes I had never been born; I ruined everything; I made life more difficult, and she has no interest in me.”

They had to share a room

Invest in a Bed Fit for Royalty
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To make things worse, the family moved house, and the siblings had to share a room. His sister wouldn’t sleep at night and instead napped during the day when she had the space to herself.

They started avoiding each other

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It got so bad that the siblings began to deliberately avoid one another to try and keep the peace.

She couldn’t move out

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Now the older sister is over 18, but she can’t get her own place because she still requires care.

Their parents kept trying

Accepts You As You Are
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Despite everything, their parents are still trying to push them together. The young man said, “They insist that she should enjoy me while I’m home, and she told them no.”

They got angry

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Their parents got angry with both of them for not trying harder. At this point, the young man got mad and told them it was their fault his sister couldn’t take care of herself because they’d never helped her.

Was he wrong?

The Same Conversation Across Different Locations
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Was the young man wrong to keep his distance, or was it the best thing for both him and his sister?

The internet responded

Reddit
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One person said, “From what you have said, your parents ignored her autism and never fully accepted she has it, and it sounds like they never made the necessary changes needed for her to make her comfortable.”

Another person said, “It is beautiful that you are so empathetic and compassionate to your sister’s needs when they have such a negative impact on your life. You’re a good kid.”

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