His Wife Earned 10 Times His Modest Teacher’s Salary, but When He Asked Her to Support His Family, Old Tensions Came to the Surface

A man recently shared a story online about how his wife refused to help support his family. Her salary is enormous and allows her to care for her parents, but he felt there was enough to help his family, too. Here’s what he had to say.

Big earner

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The man wrote, “My wife has a high-paying job and earns significantly more than I do.”

Equitable split

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“I work as a teacher and make around £40,000 (approximately $49,000), while she works in the private sector and makes £400,000 ($490,000) after tax,” he added. “We split our finances equitably, with her paying 70% to my 30%.”

Hard Working parents

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His wife’s parents immigrated to the country so she and her sister could have a better life. The move paid off because one is a surgeon while the other has a great job in tech.

Different families

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His family is somewhat different. His parents worked in government jobs, and his sister was unemployed. In comparison, they are a low-income family.

Helping hand

Emotional Labor
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When his sister became a young mother, his wife helped her by giving her a job as a secretary. However, his sister left after a month because she struggled to balance a career and motherhood.

Retired parents

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His wife’s parents retired. She and her sister both give them £2,000 ($2,400) per month on top of their retirement fund.

Asking questions

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When the man asked his wife why her parents needed all that money, she told him it didn’t come from their shared funds. He then pointed out that his parents were in much greater need of support.

Taking responsibility

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His wife told him that her parents had sacrificed a lot by moving to a new country. She informed the man that they were her responsibility, while his parents were his.

Flaring tensions

Brutal Honesty
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She told him that she never pressured him to contribute more to the household, so she didn’t understand why he would pressure her to help with his family.

Previous problem

farm
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It’s not the first time this situation has surfaced. Previously, the man had asked his wife to loan his sister money for a down payment on a home. However, she refused because she felt the sister was unreliable and was skeptical she’d get paid back.

Is he in the right?

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The man couldn’t understand why his wife was so reluctant to help his family. He even felt she was being cheap. So, he wrote to an online forum to ask for a second opinion, but it wasn’t pretty.

The internet responded

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One poster said, “Your sense of entitlement is vast. You could end up living on only your salary if you keep up this attitude. Get a side hustle if you want to support your folks so much.”

While another replied, “She’s your wife, not a sugar mama for you and your family.”

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