His Wife Made Plans Behind His Back and Then Demanded He Change His Weekly Golf Game to Accommodate Them, but When He Refused, She Branded Him Selfish

A man recently needed some advice because his wife thought he wasn’t pulling his weight when it came to his stepdaughter. Here’s what happened.

They’d been married for five years

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A 38-year-old man and his 34-year-old wife had been married for five years and had a happy relationship. When they’d married, he’d gained a stepdaughter, Emily, who was four at the time.

They shared custody

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His wife and her ex-husband shared custody of Emily. The man said, “We have her Monday to Thursday, and she’s at her dad’s Friday to Sunday.”

She already had a dad

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Before they married, the man’s wife explained to him that Emily had a great dad, so he didn’t need to be a father figure for her; he just needed to be a good authority figure.

It made sense

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The man said, “I didn’t mind and tried my best to respect that boundary. She’s a sweet child who doesn’t cause trouble, so it wasn’t like I had to discipline her.”

Her ex remarried

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Recently, Emily’s father remarried, and he now had two stepchildren to take care of. They stayed at his place from Wednesday to Saturday each week.

Emily didn’t like them

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The issue was that Emily didn’t get along with her new stepsiblings, so when they were at her dad’s place at the same time, it caused problems.

He asked to change the days

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Emily’s father asked if they would mind changing her days so there was no overlap. The man said, “It’s not a big deal in itself because we live near each other, and Emily can easily be dropped off at school no matter where she stays.”

There was a problem

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Although the idea was theoretically possible, there was a problem with the plan, and had the man been consulted, he could have explained. But his wife agreed to the change without talking to him first.

Saturdays were the problem

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The man was expected to take care of Emily on Saturday because his wife went out to study a course from 9 to 5.

He had a prior appointment

Golf 
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Babysitting Emily wouldn’t usually have been a problem, but the man played golf with his brother and sister every Saturday and had been doing so for years.

She asked him to change it

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His wife asked if he could change his golf day, but Saturday morning was the only time they could get together, and he didn’t want to end the tradition.

She told him golf was stupid

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His wife got mad and told him that golf was a stupid game. She also said it was unfair of him to put his siblings first when he had a stepdaughter to look after. The disagreement was so bad that the man had to sleep on the couch.

Was he wrong?

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Was the man wrong not to cancel his golf game, or was he doing what his wife had asked when she said he wasn’t there to be a father to Emily?

The internet responded

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One person said, “Honestly, this is down to the parents to resolve. While you’re in her life, it’s been made clear she has two parents and doesn’t need a third.”

Another person said, “Your wife can’t say her daughter doesn’t need you as a stepfather, but then expect you to step up as a stepfather every single Saturday when she needs you.”

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