She Doesn’t Want to Help Her Mother Move House as She Is Always Stuck with The Bill and Doesn’t Think It’s Fair

A woman recently asked Reddit if she was wrong for not wanting to help her mother move. Her mom moves house every two years and is becoming a financial burden. Here’s what the daughter had to say.

The mother liked to move house every couple of years

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The 32-year-old woman’s 60-year-old mother had a habit of frequently moving houses and would often ask her daughter for help. This behavior had been going on since the woman was a child, and she grew increasingly frustrated with it. 

The woman was annoyed by her mother

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“Even in childhood, in my first four years of life, I lived in multiple houses,” she explained.

Her mother would make excuses, saying, “We have financial problems” or “We are doing financially better,” but the daughter knew that money wasn’t the reason.

Her mother wanted to move again

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The mother recently contacted her, asking if she knew of places within a certain price range to rent. This angered the daughter, but she didn’t let her mother know. 

She questioned her mother’s motives

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She asked why she wanted to move this time, and her mother replied, “I am working and will receive my pension.” But the woman knew her mother was looking for a bigger place closer to her grandchild. She also knew that the pension wouldn’t be enough to cover the expenses in the long run.

The woman didn’t know what to do

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She had two options. The first was to refuse to help her mother unless she consulted a financial professional and a psychologist to understand why she needed to move and spend so much money. 

The second option

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She could tell her mother that she was not being sensible. It wouldn’t be fair to other family members if she needed financial aid because her children, siblings, and ex-husband would have to rescue her.

The mother had financially relied on her family before

Everything Becoming Monetized
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From the age of 16 to 25, the woman and her siblings had been financially supporting their mother. The mother had also expected her ex-husband to give her the money she didn’t receive during their divorce. 

The mother could be narcissistic

Karen Stereotypes
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The woman and her husband had set boundaries in their relationship with her mother due to her narcissistic behavior and entitlement to their money. “Right now, if she needs money, she needs to ask my husband because I’m not working, but really it’s because I always fall for her emotional manipulation,” she explained.

She asked the internet for advice

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In the past ten years, the mother had moved five times, with her children always lending a hand. The woman didn’t want to keep supporting her mother’s unrealistic expectations, so she turned to Reddit for guidance.

People responded

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One person replied, “Good job having your husband be the buffer. Everything you suggested is reasonable.”

Someone else said, “Stop giving her money and don’t help her find a new place. She’s a grown woman. If she wants to move, she can do it herself, and she can learn to live on the money she has without mooching off her kids.”

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Source: Reddit

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