She Wanted a Child-Free Wedding, but She Had No Idea It Would Mean Her Fiancé’s Groomsman Would Have to Pull Out of the Ceremony

A woman recently asked for some advice because her husband’s family didn’t like the fact that they’d decided to have a child-free wedding. Here’s what happened.

He had a big family

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A 26-year-old woman’s 28-year-old fiancé came from a big family, and most of his relatives had several children each.

He was an only child

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The fiancé’s father, however, had chosen to keep his own family small and have one child. The woman said, “My fiancé has no siblings of his own but a large number of cousins, some of whom he’s quite close to.”

They decided on a child-free wedding

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The woman and her fiancé had a long talk about who they should and shouldn’t invite to their wedding, and in the end, they decided that they’d keep it child-free, with only those aged 18 or older invited.

They wanted it to be a special day

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The woman said, “We don’t want any interruptions, distractions, destruction, etc. This is meant to be our special day.”

It helped with their budget

Make an Actual Budget and Stick to It
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As well as the fact that the wedding would be calmer without kids, it also meant they could choose a smaller venue, so it was great for their budget.

They arranged another party

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So that no one would feel left out of their celebrations, the couple decided to arrange a separate party a week after the wedding for all the children to come to. That way, everyone could participate in the celebrations.

She thought it was a mistake

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After the invitations, which specified that the wedding was to be child-free, were sent, her fiancé’s aunt called and said there had been a mistake. She had eight children (and was also pregnant) and assumed that all her kids would be invited.

He put her straight

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The fiancé spoke calmly to his aunt and told her firmly that there wasn’t a mistake and that there really were no under-18s invited to the wedding. This caused an argument that went back and forth for a while, with no one getting anywhere.

The 19-year-old wouldn’t come

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The aunt finally agreed that her kids wouldn’t come to the wedding, but she also said that her eldest, a 19-year-old, wouldn’t come either.

He was a groomsman

The Same Conversation Across Different Locations
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This came as a big shock because the 19-year-old cousin was meant to be a groomsman in the wedding party.

He asked why

scold
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The woman’s fiance wanted to know why the 19-year-old wouldn’t come when he was specifically invited and even had a job to do.

She needed a babysitter

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The aunt told him that she couldn’t afford a sitter (and didn’t want a stranger taking care of her children anyway), and if they weren’t invited to the wedding, someone—i.e., the 19-year-old—would have to stay home and take care of them. The aunt also said it wouldn’t be fair to the younger ones if the eldest got to attend the wedding. Then she hung up.

Was she right?

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Was the woman right to insist on a child-free wedding, or should she make allowances for the aunt after she gave her reasons?

The internet responded

Posting Everything About Your Personal Business and Drama on Social Media
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One person said, “Uninvite the aunt so the cousin can go. That’s her babysitting sorted.”

Another person commented, “Your aunt’s concern about childcare is valid and one that any host that chooses not to invite children needs to take into consideration.”

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