She’d Booked Her Dream 30th Birthday Party, but Then Her Friend Began Demanding She Alter Her Plans to Accommodate Her New Boyfriend’s Son

A woman recently went online to ask if she was right to alter her long-planned 30th birthday party to accommodate her friend’s new boyfriend’s young son. Here’s her story.

They were all young

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“My friendship group is mostly other women in their late 20s and early 30s,” the 30-year-old began

No kids involved

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“For reference, none of us have kids, and the only one dating someone with kids is my friend Kenzie.”

Her friend was dating

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The woman explained that Kenzie was dating a man named Jared, who was a single dad to his five-year-old son Ned.

The child’s mom was absent

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She went on to say that Ned’s mom wasn’t involved in his upbringing because she was suffering from addiction issues.

It was the party of her dreams

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The woman had booked her 30th birthday party at her favorite hot grill restaurant. She was going all-out and paying for everyone, including drinks and cabs from and to her place. The whole thing has been booked for months.

Her friend wanted a plus-one

You Speak So Well
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Kenzie had recently asked the woman if she could bring Ned along to the party—Jared was going to be out of town on a work trip. The woman had instantly said no.

She gave her reasons

Unsolicited Parenting Opinions_Advice
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The woman justified her refusal by explaining that there was going to be a hot grill and alcohol, and in all honesty, she just didn’t want a kid at her 30th birthday party.

Kenzie tried to compromise

Emotional Labor
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Kenzie offered a kind of compromise by promising to stay sober and pay for Ned’s food. All the woman had to do was move her booking to a regular table, not one near the hot grill.

She stood firm

Relying on Me Too Much for Emotional Labor
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The woman, however, was adamant that she was going to change her plans. The grill was the whole point of booking that particular restaurant.

Kenzie tried stirring things up

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Kenzie hadn’t taken her friend’s refusal lightly. She’d started sending messages in their friends’ group chat, accusing the woman of “discriminating” against her because of her “family status.”

She doubled down

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The woman clapped back, saying that a) this was not a suitable event for a child and b) Kenzie had only been dating Jared for three months. The woman was frankly concerned that he thought leaving his young son with Kenzie was acceptable in the first place—the woman said she wouldn’t leave her cat with someone she’d only known that long, let alone a child.

Was she wrong?

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The woman asked the online community for their thoughts on her situation.

The internet responded

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Like the woman, the internet saw the situation in black-and-white. “She doesn’t have to come,” stated one. “Simple. Easy. End of!”

“Just keep your cool about it,” advised another. “Kenzie is making some red-flag choices, and it’s important to remain centered with people who are unstable. Kenzie is unstable, as evidenced by her behavior in group chat.”

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